Monday, June 15, 2009

Being married really isn’t as scary as some say…..

Every where you go these days, people seem to be singing the same song, saying the same thing, seeing same thing …… horrible marriage is , has become, will become or worse.

I really can’t say there aren’t bad marriages out there, but then there also are beautiful marriages out there. If this is the case, why then do we have so much noise on bad marriages?

are these deliberate attempts at scaring the singles away from marriage by those involved in the so called bad marriages?

are those who feel they can no longer tolerate their marriage hence gone the divorce root trying to justify there actions?

are single girls really looking for excuse to remain single and justify being single?

As I type away, I can’t seem to find an answer that quite fit.

There are beautiful marriages out there to which some can attest to quite alright, but why are we not hearing the good song out loud and clear?

Hmmph ! It’s so much headache having to listen too much to these negative songs when we all know that there are some positive songs out there on marriages even here in Nigeria. Ha ha ha, I had to say it that way cos lately, there seem to be a misconception that happily married couples in Nigeria hardly exist as any which is seen, it is either the woman have to be taking so much shit or is just enduring the marriage itself.

Ms. Emotion is back after taking a necessary leave of absence. Am sorry I vanished the way I did, it was not pre meditated I can tell you. A very big congrats to the mommies in the house and the new mommies to be, no need to mention names now rite? So, I believe every body is doing gr8.

… a very good evening to you all.


Ms. emotions


doll said...


doll said...

welcome back...miss emotions...missed you

doll said...

my take is...even if marriage is bad for would be good for me...i am looking forward to marriage..that is why am being very deliberate in choosing a husband

Funms-the rebirth said...

glad ur back..... true talk. there are good marriages out there. we all have to find the right person to work it out with...cuz everything in life has challenges

Good Naija Girl said...

Welcome back! You said it: there are still good marriages out there and we can all do our part to ensure that we enter into one of the good ones. Every good thing requires hard work though, so if you put God at the centre of the search for your partner, your courtship and then later your marriage, he will bless you accordingly.

Have a great week!

NigerianDramaQueen said...

Marriage: Great with the right person at the right time. Horrible otherwise. My 2cents.
Hmmm Ms.Emotions I hope you're here for real this time (although I should be the last person to speak!)

chayoma said...

welcome back!
when saying those vows, people should honestly think deep about what they r saying and whether or not they mean it!
to spend the rest of ur life with someone no matter what comes ur way i believe is a life changing step!
Those who have good marriages have to work on their marriages.
it is all about COMPROMISE(see single pikin giving marriage counseling oh,LWKM)
But both parties have got to come to an agreement. they are both equals, partners! No kings and subjects NO!
u make ur marriage what it is!


welcome back.

Marriage can be horrible if one marries the wrong person and or has the wrong attitude.

Marriage can be a wonderful blessing if one marries well and puts in the work to maintain the relationship.

Nothing is ever black or white, or easy, shebi?

How far?

Lee said...

There will always be positive and negative news. Like they say, your thinking pattern creates your reality, so if you think there are bad marriages, then you will have a bad marriage and vice versa. A newly wed here who can say marriage is a beautiful institution. It just depends on both parties and how they are willing to tolerate each other flaws, apart from that, everything's all good.

darkelcee said...

marriage is indeed wonderful with the right person of course. there will be ups and downs but once there is unity of purpose and vision.... it will work out.

Welcome back dearie

rethots said...

"... is back after taking a necessary leave of absence." *winks* hmmm.....

MArriage is two people consciously choosing to 'walk' the rest of the journey side-by-side together.

tobenna said...

Firstly, 6 months is a long time to be off for?! Welcome back though.
You've been hearing a one-sided story. Not entirely true. All I've been seeing are happy marriages meself. I think I've been seeing one-sided too...

FFF said...

my sista, e be like say u dey my mind. one day, i just hala 4 fb cos i was totally pissed wit one blogger dat was making so much wave by advertizing her bad marriage. i went 2 her site & read so many single girls confessing their scare of marriage, & i was like WTF!!!!! Is dis this woman's aim? I know it probably wasn't, but she was just reinforcing some false notions abt marriage.

I think they were probably more good marriages in naija dan bad ones, but its d scary stories of d bad ones dat pple hear. Y? cos the world would probably more easily run 2 ur sympathy if u cry foul. Those in good marriages may not be so vocal abt their good fortunes cos they fear sounding too cheesy, invoking envy, or even receiving some very cynical responses like 'enjoy it while it lasts' (which i get a lot!!!!!!!!! daz very annoying!!!!!!!! wot do u mean 'enjoy it while it lasts? as in, i should be prepared to face bad times with my husband? is dat ur prayer 4 me??????').

no one said marriage is easy oh, but it's not d hard work dat makes a marriage bad. actually, d rewards of d hard work is wot makes marriage so sweet. wen u learn tolerance, & see it producing results with ur husband taking it upon himself to adjust 4 ur sake. u ddnt have to nag ur head off 4 it, u didnt have to call village meetings, or crying many nights cos u feel God has given u d worse trial of all times. yes, tolerance is hard, but wen u look @ all u were spared from by acquiring it, u tell urself, 'this life is sweet after all'.

p.s: i think more single people seem to 'sniff' bad marriages than married people? ok, maybe am speaking 4 myself (wen i was single, every marriage looked 'almost' bad to me). now dat am married, am not quick to label a marriage bad oh. cos i don see wetin dey inside d thing. i've understood d diff between reality & fantasy.


babe, wissai you dey?

Naija Chickito said...

*Ding Ding* Where you at? Come back (just playing the same song you played over at my blog!)
Come back when you are good and ready, we still dey.

Marriage is great. Not just saying that because I'm a newly wed (well sorta). If both people are willing for it to be great then it will be. It is a decision by BOTH parties o.

hip recall said...

True. I used to share such sentiments before but it changed when i get married three years ago. i guess both of the couple should exert effort to keep the relationship nourished and alive.