Monday, September 24, 2007

He loves me, he loves me not

As a woman you tend to be familiar to this line of question. He loves me? He loves me not? So how can you really know weather he really loves you or not?

The best way to answer this question is by asking instead is this love or infatuation?
Love is a friendship that has “caught” fire overtime while infatuation is an instant fire or an instant desire.
It becomes dangerous to differentiate love and infatuation in the early stage of a relationship, say in the first one to three weeks. This is the stage I like to call the “formation stage”. Needless to say that love its self starts with a strong sexual attraction for the opposite sex – a strong sexual attraction itself can be called infatuation hence the difficulty is discerning what he feels for you within the first to three weeks of starting a relationship.
What I call the formation stage is that period where a man tries to discover what he feels for you or what he wants to do with you. This is the stage where if its love, he starts developing some sorta emotional attachment to you which in no time blossoms into love, while if he is just sexually interested he acts so obvious that it isn’t hard for you to tell that he is infatuated.

After about a month of being in a relationship with a man, you must be able to look out for the signs that tell u what he feels for you, is it love or infatuation? Your inner instinct will tell you. Do u guys remember my last post on emotional fulfillment where I said in your hearts of heart, you are able to tell weather or not you are emotionally fulfilled? Same thing also applies in this instance.

If a man is infatuated, as a lady, you will be able to tell by accessing how he acts when you are together. Is he always looking forward to ending it in intimacy? Always wanting to ‘get it’ from you? Is that all he looks forward to each time you are together, if yes, the guy is only sexually attracted to you which in most cases is termed infatuation. This though is not the end of the world really as most guys find sexual attraction coming on strong to them before love dose. in essence, a guy sexually attracted to you can turn around and feel deep love for you in the long run. But the fear is that he may just remain infatuated and overtime just like the attraction dies a natural death and he takes off.

Love on the other hand takes a root and grows one day at a time, if a guy is in love with you, each time you are together he feel quite relaxed and always is on the look out for fun and exciting activities u can involve yourselves while you are together. He is more interested in things that affects and matters to you and how they affect you. Love they say lights up a man so much so that you really will not have to ask if he loves or loves you not.

Wow!!! I think I have to go back to work hoping that I have been able make some sense in my little write up.

Pls! Pls! Pls! Leave me a comment if by chance you happen to drop by so I can at least know am not the only person that reads my post. lol
Your comments will be welcomed!

ciao



2 comments:

Anonymous said...

Your advice is very helpful, I'm in a long distance relationship and often wonder about his feelings for me. This tells me what I need to know. I also read your post on giving a man space and I think I'm going to try that. He's going through a rough patch so I'm going to give him time to himself but still be available if he wants to talk. Wish me luck!

Anonymous said...

I seldom comment, however i did a few searching and wound up here "He loves me, he loves me not".

And I do have some questions for you if it's allright. Is it just me or does it give the impression like some of the comments look like left by brain dead visitors? :-P And, if you are posting on additional sites, I'd like to keep up with anything new you have to post.

Could you list of every one of all your shared pages like your linkedin profile, Facebook page or twitter feed?


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